School has begun.  I was a little concerned about meeting the requirements of teaching and the needs of the kids this year - nothing new really, and I zoomed off to a conversation I had with Nate's dad when we were in Delta for the Fourth of July.  He was talking about his dairy experiences and where it had led him and he said, "that's just what I do."  I'm a 2nd grade teacher, "that's just what I do."  It's been a good career, full of challenge, accomplishment, frustration and every other emotion that I've become acquainted with.  I'll give it my best shot this year and make a difference in the lives of these kids.  

This is one of Valerie's pictures from Zion.  It instantly connected with me and I put it on my desktop.  I study it quite often as I meditate on my life.  I know everyone was disappointed when we didn't get to hike the Subway.  The Right Fork was a mediocre hike at best, but it brought us together for a moment in time.  In my "olden days" I was always seeking for glimpses of the divine as I hiked along pondering my life's potentialities.  Now I look at these crumbling cliffs and rock-strewn shores and feel a sense of my inner self.  I tend toward disorganization and find myself in endless cycles of improvement and renewal.  Sometimes I throw out the old before I begin the new, but not very often  - thus clutter collects.  

We've been moving rooms.  Nathan moved into Erica's room, Josh moved into my upstairs room, I moved down to Nathan's old room and Erica moved to Grandmas.  I've spent a lot of time going on trips to D.I. and the dumpster.  

Denice pointed out that under a tree, on the right, there is a Bigfoot creature sitting on a log.  Bigfoot and other illusions stalk my landscape at times.  We nurture the ideal and the big, smelly, hairy beast of reality tramples on it.   So many of my ideals were formed in Zion as I hiked through red-rock canyons, stained black from seeping water.  There is a sense of eternity here.  Time slowly chips away at the vain and unnecessary elements of our lives, helping us identify and  realize our fondest hopes and dreams.   

Zion has just the right balance of colors.  They complement and contrast with each other - always pleasing to the eye.  Yellow has always been my favorite color - it's bright and enthusiastic.   The past few years green has been creeping up on me and eclipsing yellow.  Green is the color of life and has so many shades.  Color is one of life's greatest blessings and joys.  It's just there, everywhere you look, beckoning you to pay attention and enjoy the ride we're experiencing on Spaceship Earth.  I didn't get to the sky and water, but those ramblings will have to wait for another post.  

Summer's Almost Over

Here's what I've been up to this summer:

Working on mom's personal history.   As the History Committee Chairman, I wrote in the Porter Family Newsletter: "I'm having a wonderful experience with my mother, recording her personal history!  We talk and type, reread and refine as she shares stories of life, love, courage and hope - line upon line.  My mother is a quilt maker, and is feverishly working to create quilts for each of her living posterity.  Each experience we record is a block in her life's quilt, one that will be shared by all.  My love and respect for her has deepened, my desire to be more like her has grown." 

Creating a kiva for my classroom.  After two years of investigating and planning I built my classroom kiva.  The materials cost $250.  Mike Leemaster (a former student and Josh's old freind) and his dad, came over to show me how to carpet it.  I realized I was in over my head and called Blair Sampson, who carpeted our family room, to do the job (that cost $100).  It's essential to know what you can and can't do, and when it's best to let a professional do the job. I just read through my journal for this past year and that's why I made this last comment.  I've been trying to focus on "the essentials."  You could say "how time flies," but you could also say, "time creeps like and ancient turtle slogging through silent slippery sand."  Actually you can say anything you want - and what a two-edged sword that is.  For your information, a kiva is:  1) a sacred, underground ceremonial chamber  2) an underground storage pit  3) a loan made to poor entrepreneurs in third world countries.  I combined all three concepts to help me organize and unify my 2nd grade charges this year.  My only limitation was I had to keep it above ground.  

We had new siding put on the house.  With the forest and desert mingling with the outside walls it was time to put our last set of clothes on the house before yard and house become as one.

Finishing the weekend project I started in January.  This is a substitute for my dream of building a cabin that will most likely not come to pass (the downsizing of a dream).  The old knotty pine bedroom lives on.  Mom made the drapes.  Mom and I chose the couch.  Erica and mom argued about most of the decor, but agreed that the final outcome was "just fine."   Welcome to our family kiva - partially underground.

Survival of the Fittest

Before our “blog conversation” with the family down in Zion, I knew “Survival of the Fittest” was a fit for my up and coming perspective on life. Like David, I think I’ve always been able to overcome challenges, meet expectations and generally carry on in a somewhat acceptable manner – until the past few years. I’ve learned that trials are trials because they don’t have completion dates; you might make it through and then you might not, but definitely your own resources are not adequate. Survival asks us to attune to our world, to take nothing for granted, to be vigilant and wary. I have several quotes that define my efforts to be a more humane human. “I don’t divide the world into the weak and the strong, or the successes and the failures, those who make it or those who don’t. I divide the world into learners and nonlearners. There are people who learn, who are open to what happens around them, who listen, who hear the lessons. When they do something stupid, they don’t do it again. And when they do something that works a little bit, they do it even better and harder the next time. The question to ask is not whether you are a success or a failure, but whether you are a learner or a nonlearner – Carole Hyatt and Linda Gottlieb.” I’ve seen so many characteristics in family members these past weeks that I want to more fully develop. Words so many times mask our inner insecurities. It’s easy to talk, but harder to walk the talk. I want to more than survive I want to thrive, but first things first. I’ll always remember My Grandpa Porter’s lament near the end of his life; “Paul, why didn’t I ever do anything great?” His expectations for himself stretched beyond what his daily allotment of time could reach. I guess I’m a little like that.